The Wuxi China Expatdom Has a Thriving Counter Culture

The Meicun District of the Wuxi China Expatdom has become home to a thriving counter culture community. Freaks, mountebanks and assorted oddballs, from the world over, have converged on the district to partake of the Wuxi China district’s alternative music, ascetic naturism and counting practices.

Abbie Hoffman, a convicted felon turned Wuxi Expat, attributes the rise of the Wuxi China Expatdom’s counter culture to the one million percent GDP growth it has experienced in the last year. "With its economy producing so much, so fast, there are a whole lot of things to count, man!" said Hoffman who tells the WCE Blog that he loves to count bridges and public toilets in Wuxi.

Jerry Garcia, a musician Expat from the USA, told the WCE Blog, that the counting songs, being played in the bars of Meicun’s Haight Ashbury bar street, were mind-blowing. "I never heard the beers on the wall song before. I saw a band start at a thousand beers on the wall and then count down. It was totally awesome when they kept the crowd in suspense about how many beers they would take down off the wall! Sometimes, it was one; sometimes, it was two; sometimes, it was five. It was way out CNCC machine groovy!"

Thanks to the counter culture, the Meicun District has become the part of the Wuxi China Expatdom that never sleeps as its patrons can be heard singing "one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten!" till sunrise.

Long established Wuxi Expats have joined in the counter culture:

Wuxi Sexpats are said to be counting breasts on bar girls. "So far, I have counted two on Cherry Soda! Every time, it has been the same! But I will keeping counting them just to make extra sure they haven’t left!" says Sexpat John Hefner.

Duston Short, Midget Sumo Wrestling and Breakfast Hot Dog Eating Champion, is counting his fingers. "I have to take off my shoes to do it!" says Short who says he is still confused about the order of numbers. "I never know if five comes before eight or afterwards!" Duston’s brother Justin is counting his toes. "To make it more of a challenge for myself, I am counting my toes with my eyes closed!" said Justin Short.

Many Wuxi Expats are counting the number of copies they can find of the best-selling book The Poolside Harry Moore. "So far I have counted 128,999,675!" says Hans Klinger, a member of the WCE Trio band.

Andis Kaulins, the English Teacher who is not to be confused with the Andis Kaulins who is the President of the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association and the Andis Kaulins who is the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Elite Expat Association, is said to be counting his money. "Only problem is my pockets are so deep, I find it hard to get down to the money!" said ET Kaulins.

Archduke and Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore tells the WCE Blog that when he now counts the daisy petals he pulls as he contemplates the question of whether his wife Miss Moneypenny loves him a little or a whole lot. "She loves me little; she loves me a lot; one; she loves me little; she loves lots, two. That is how I do it now!" says Moore, his tousled hair shining sublimely in the mid-day Wuxi sun.

The commanders of the three arms of the Wuxi China Expatdom Armed Forces have embraced the counter culture as well. Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy Commander, Admiral Lloyd Bridges is counting all his aircraft carriers and destroyers. Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Air Force Commander, Air Marshall Gregory Peck is counting all his fighter-jets, helicopters, heavy-bombers, light-bombers, gliders, Shopwith Camels and B-52s. Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Land Force Commander, General Colonel Harlan Sanders is counting his tanks, mortars and artillery pieces.

It is Wuxi China Expatdom Police Force Officer McNulty who is credited with starting the WCE counter-culture. "His ability to dispense his personal and idiosyncratic brand of he-man, self-made, here’s-how-you-do-it, divinely righteous, Good-Housekeeping-Seal-of-Approval-approved justice, while at the same time being able to keep count of the heads he has busted, is an inspiration to us all!" McNulty’s commander Chief Inspector Harry Callahan.

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About wuxiandis

An English Teacher in Wuxi, China. Married to a local girl. Father of a boy born August 23, 2007.
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