Barack’s Plan B: Move to the Wuxi China Expatdom!

With his popularity plummeting because none of his policies are working, U.S. President Barack Obama is formulating a plan B for what to do with his life after January 2013 when the first term of his presidency will end. Confidants of President Obama say that his Plan A is to continue on as President of the USA till 2016, but if it doesn’t pan out for him, he will move to the Wuxi China Expatdom to become an English Teacher and an advocate for Naturism.

Barack’s wife Michelle has told the WCE Blog that Barack doesn’t have his heart in the job of being U.S. President anymore. Said the First Lady: "The polls and the economic numbers are depressing him. When his advisers ask him to make decisions, Barack seems very distracted and inattentive. I was stunned to walk into the oval office one night, and find him ignoring a whole pile of reports on his desk — he was instead leafing through his copies of the Poolside Harry Moore and the official biography of His Majesty, the King of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Gorzo the Mighty. And to top it off, he was also buff naked. At Sasha’s and Malia’s bedtime, he will read them stories from the Poolside Harry Moore for children! Another night, I found him burning all our clothes and muttering to himself that he had to go to the WCE!"

His Majesty King Gorzo the Mighty said that Obama was welcome to come to the WCE in 2013 but only under direct supervision and with certain provisos. "Obviously, Barack is not allowed to be in any positions that require him making decisions. He has to promise to behave himself better than that other former President: Bill Clinton who we had to deport because he kept on hitting on Bar Girls and was stalking Prime Minister Mango. Barack must also promise not to bring that dipsomaniac Joe Biden with him. As long as he does that, I sure his skills at public-speaking will make him a great English teacher and an advocate for Naturism." said Gorzo.

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About wuxiandis

An English Teacher in Wuxi, China. Married to a local girl. Father of a boy born August 23, 2007.
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