The WCEDVDAS Civil War taking place in the Wuxi China Expatdom claimed its first civilian casualties yesterday as several Expats from the Canadian province of Ontario injured themselves when trying to pronounce "WCEDVDAS" as if it were a word.
Doctor Marcus Welby Scott the Second, head of the emergency department at the Wuxi China Expatdom General Hospital #15, told the WCE blog that on Wednesday evening several Expats from Ontario, Canada were picked up in the area of Nanchang Jie Bar Street, taken to the WCEGH #15 emergency section and are now listed in serious, but stable condition in the pronunciation injuries ward.
Officer McNulty, of the Wuxi China Expatdom police squad, told the WCE Blog that investigations conducted by his crack team of constables and their gorilla helpers revealed that the Ontario Expats had been drinking and talking about the WCEDVDAS Civil War. "They spent a least three hours last night trying to pronounce "WCEDVDAS." They were not dissuaded by other patrons telling them that "WCEDVDAS" was an acronym and that pronouncing it as if it were a word was futile. When the manager at Dangle’s Participle told them to vacate the premises, they left immediately, but were so engrossed in the pronunciation of WCEDVDAS that they didn’t pay attention to where they were going. Several of them walked straight into a nearby canal. At least two walked right into moving traffic. Another kept banging his head into a wall that he kept trying to walk into!" said McNulty.
Military Commanders of the two WCEDVDAS organizations involved in the Civil War had proudly boasted that no civilians had been injured or killed in their skirmishing. When confronted with reports of the injuries of the Ontario Expats, both commanders said that they Ontario Expats couldn’t really be classified as civilians. One commander went so far as to say, off the record, that Expats from Ontario, Canada couldn’t even be classified as human.
The WCEDVDAS civil war, which has been going on since March 2, has already seen memorabilia sales exceed those of World Wars One and Two combined.