Bombs thrown and Guns fired at Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President’s motorcade in Sarajevo

Despite several assassination attempts, Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore’s visit to the Sarajevo Bosnia and Herzegovina Expatdom Colony was considered an astounding success.

President Moore, who is a Wuxi China Expatdom Archduke, toured the SB&H Expatdom alongside his host Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg, in a Gräf & Stift open sports car, with its top folded down. Sometimes during the tour, several bombs of various explosive capabilities, from old-fashioned hand-held to atomic weapons, were directed toward the Gräf & Stift open sports car. President Moore was able to ward off the many projectiles and bombs, directed his way, with graceful ease. "You going to have a hard time throwing bombs at a man whose classmates in Kung Fu and Jujitsu School included our current Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy Commander Lloyd Bridges, Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Land Forces Commander General Colonel Sanders, Chuck Norris, Pierce Broslund, George S. Patton, Bruce Lee, Steve McQueen and Jackie Chen!" declared President Moore, who had already appeared to have forgotten the incident when asked about it.

Afterwards, WCEFAS President Harry Moore’s film talk about the Cinema and World War One, held at the Sarajevo Bosnia and Herzegovina Expatdom Colony Town Hall was received with much adulation The ten million who attended the speech afterwards celebrated by forming the longest conga party line in European history, or at least since the Diet of Worms.

After the speech, the motorcade got lost on the way to the airport. Making a left turn instead of a right turn, the motorcade drove right past Schiller’s delicatessen where a meeting of the Gavrilo Princip wing of the Quentin Tarantino faction of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society was just breaking up. The driver, when realizing the mistake, popped the clutch. Seeing President Moore in the stalled Gräf & Stift open sports car, all four hundred of the Principates pulled our their 9x17mm pistols and fired at Moore, but thankfully missed. They did however mess the WCEFAS President’s hair causing the U.N. General Assembly to hold an emergency meeting to express its concern.

President Moore was eventually able to make it to the airport to catch his flight to Washington D.C. where he is scheduled to attend the first screening of the film My American Cousin at Ford’s Theatre. Worries have been raised about another assassination attempt on President Moore when he goes to the Ford Theater. It was there in 1865 that John Wilkes Booth assassinated President Lincoln. Many have expressed concern that Moore would attend the screening sponsored by the John Wilkes Booth Wing of the Quentin Tarantino Faction of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society.


About wuxiandis

An English Teacher in Wuxi, China. Married to a local girl. Father of a boy born August 23, 2007.
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