Wuxi China Expat says he has a beautiful and sublime body

Bobby Bellamy, a Wuxi Expat, says he is an advocate for the beauty of his body.

"Men of honesty and good will would all agree, if they cared to look, that my body is beautiful and sublime!" said Bellamy, who says he spends his time, whether on the job or in leisure, promoting the sublime beauty of his body to other Expats and locals alike.

Bellamy, who teaches English at a local primary school, says he uses his body’s beauty and sublimeness to teach vocabulary to his students. "I have used the sublimity of my body to enhance their vocabulary. I can now hear them, when they are on the playground, use the words "sublime, splendorous, wondrous, pleasurable, soft, delicate, tight, fondle, grope, caress, delightful, texture, natural, divine, comely, Harry Moore, iron-like, extensive, massive, shiny, resplendent, tone, ample, endowment and dueling scar" among others. For their English speaking competition, many of my students choose to talk about the difference between the beauty and sublime using photos of my body parts!"

Bellamy tells the WCE Blog that he spends his advocacy time canvassing the Wuxi China Expat Hall of Fame director Kennesaw "Hui Shan" Landis to enshrine him or, at least, his wonderful body therein. "I believe that four 8888m tall statues depicting my body, at each corner of the WCEHoF grounds would warm the spirits of everyone in the Wuxi China Expatdom! Kennesaw doesn’t agree yet, but I am softening him with my 24 hour round-the-clock email and SMS campaign!"

On his own initiative, though, Bellamy has produced one million 4 foot by 3 foot posters featuring images of his body and distributed them where ever he goes in the WCE. "Even if the posters are use to wrap fish or placed at the bottom of bird cages, I know that that everyday life of the average person is being made more beautiful and sublime!"

Bellamy says he also hopes to team up with Harry Moore and produce a book called The Sublime Duo of Harry Moore & Bob Bellamy Poolside. "So far, His Sublimeness Moore has no returned any of my phone calls and emails!" said Bellamy, the regret obvious from the emotional cracking of his voice.

Bellamy’s colleagues say they find his advocacy efforts something to behold, but misdirected. Guy Batterson, who also teaches with Bellamy at a Wuxi primary school, says that Bellamy has scared many of his Chinese colleagues by his advocacy. "A teacher can’t enter the office without Bob showing them a joint and a hidden crevice in his body!" said Batterson who wished to be unnamed for this news story. "Still, he pursues the advocacy for the beauty of his body with a single-mindedness that I wish I could apply to my girlfriend!"

The owner of the Chestnut Pub, Bellamy’s local, Wally Droop, says that Bellamy is one patron who appreciates being fondled and groped.


About wuxiandis

An English Teacher in Wuxi, China. Married to a local girl. Father of a boy born August 23, 2007.
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