Suzhou China Expatdom Colony Governor and Wuxi China Expatdom Chief Inspector Harry Callahan has begun the process of cleaning up the Suzhou China Expatdom.
The Suzhou China Expatdom’s leaders, feeling they were no longer able to deal with their many social problems, recently applied for and received colony status from the Wuxi China Expatdom and now have Callahan in their Expatdom dispensing his cleansing brand of crime-fighting.
The first thing Governor Callahan did was rid the Suzhou China Expatdom’s East Side Housing Projects of drugs and prostitutes The projects had been the virtual fiefdom of the notorious drug gangsters the Barksdale brothers: Avon, Chanel, Maybelline, and Revlon. Till Callahan ended the Barkdales’ rule, the projects in the Suzhou China Expatdom’s East Side had been eyesore with addicts, used needles, and dead bodies strewn all across its landscape.
How was it that that Callahan was able to put down the Barksdales in two days when previous attempts by the Suzhou China Expatdom, over a period of ten years, had come to nothing? Callahan said it was easy. "I walked down to the Barksdales’ hiding place with guns a blazing. They fired artillery and mortars at me, and called me pig, but it was to no avail. I easily crossed through their minefields, captured them, and cuffed them all to my car. I then dragged them around the shores of Lake Taihu for a day and a half. I let the Taihu sharks have a few bites at them. What was left of the Barksdales was crying for mercy, calling me Lord Smith and Wesson, saying they would never teach English or sell drugs in China ever again!"
Callahan said his next task will be clean up the projects on the Suzhou China Expatdom’s West Side where the Corneolli brothers run a Caramel Ball Concession.