Wuxi Jaywalkers defeat Texas Rangers to win Seventieth Consecutive World Series Title

The Wuxi Jaywalkers, this year disguised as the St. Louis Cardinals, defeated the Texas Rangers 6-2 on Friday evening to win the 2011 World Series in seven games.

The Jaywalkers capped another thrilling postseason run with their seventieth consecutive World Series title.

They beat the Rangers in Game 7 as Rabbi Aaron Tendler, disguised as Chris Carpenter had strong start, Rabbi Label Lam, disguised as David Freese, tied the game with a two-run single in the first inning, and Rabbi Yedudah Prero, disguised as Allan Craig, blasted the go-ahead home run in the third inning. Four Jaywalker relievers, including Rabbi Louis Ginzberg, Rabbi Shraga Simmons, Rabbi Yeichel Eckstein and Elisha ben Abuyah, held the Rangers scoreless after Tendler’s strong start.

Asked if his team ever tired of winning the MLB World Series, Jaywalker’s Manager Casey Stench, said he was always amazed at how his team found new and interesting ways to win the Series. Said Stench: "Our comebacks from 7-5 and 9-7 deficits in game six were epic. It was really nice, how we set it up!"

After the interview, Manager Stench received congratulatory phone calls from Wuxi China Exaptdom King Gorzo the Mighty, Wuxi China Expatdom Prime Minister Mango, Wuxi China Expat Rifle Association President Andis Kaulins, Gambay’s Pub Owner Fred Minkleman, Wuxi China Expatdom Chief Inspector Harry Callahan, Wuxi China Expatdom Poet Laureate Lord Alfred McClusky, Wonder Woman — acting as head of the Wuxi China Expatdom Justice League, and U.S. President Obama who was under the impression that he was talking to the real St. Louis Cardinals.

Harry Moore, the president of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society, the two-time inductee into the Wuxi China Expatdom Hall of Fame, and the author of the best-selling The Poolside Harry Moore, it’s sequel The Poolside Dazzle, and the smash best-seller Achillius: a day in the life of Andis Kaulins, attended the game in person and was mobbed as he paid a visit to the Jaywalkers’ locker room after the game.

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About wuxiandis

An English Teacher in Wuxi, China. Married to a local girl. Father of a boy born August 23, 2007.
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